Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Qualities to aspire to.

I'm am going to have another scan for our baby tomorrow (It's week 32 already) and will be doing that every two week til week 36 then weekly.

We have a checklist of things to buy, do and finish.

The nursery is complete. We have bought a cot (thanks mum!!), a change table (thanks Poppa), a stroller (thanks other mum and dad!), had a built in wardrobe installed and painted the walls a lovely pale green (neutral).

Some would be forgiven for thinking that take care of it. But then there's clothes, nappies, washers, towels. The list literally goes on and on.

Then there is the anxiety for mum and dad's to be about the actual birth process. Yeah dad worry too, we like to be in control and this is something we just have to stand and witness!!

Annaliese and I (mostly her) are pretty organised and have this list covered.

Now that I don't have to worry as much about this stuff my mind constantly drifts to the important issue of what kind of father am I going to be?

As a teacher I need to wear many hats including, educator, nurse, psychologist, mediator, confidant, cousellor, role model and in some cases father figure. Over the 6 years I have been teaching I have developed a style that suits me and hopefully one that most of my students appreciate. When I get sworn at and it happen frequently, I need to be patient, firm and understanding. I could let it upset me and get angry, frustrated or sad but I need to take into account what the situation is for that particular student. Did he have breakfast that morning? Was he kept up all night with irresponsible parents? Is he frustrated by his inability to understand what other students find easy? I'm not saying I should let them off scott free but simply yelling at them often has the adverse affect. They get screamed at when they are home so are used to dealing with that and ofter shut up shop and makes the situation worse. If I calmly explain the consequences of their actions they are usually more willing to follow a direction. Plus for future interactions you have developed a relationship where you aren't the evil enemy and they will ofter respond to you.

SO!!! More importantly what sort of father do I want to be? I'm assuming it will dependant on the personality of the child but I know I need to be careful not to be their bud!!! I need to find that blend between a friend who the kid can feel comfortable with and trust always but also a father who has to lay down the law when it is broken and kids will always do that.

On a less serious note I would love for my kids to follow the Kangaroos (the Giants would the cherry on top!) but I am also aware of not forcing the issue or even broaching it. Push and they are likely to hate AFL and a little part of me. I just have to hope subliminal messages are affective that they claim to be!!!


On another note every Sunday mark the next week in the pregnancy, next Sunday will be week 33 out of 40. Every Sunday when we wake up we read 'Up the duff' and the current week. It focuses on the what is happening for the baby and the mum. I loving having this update to look forward to. This Saturday just gone I thought, there isn't a book that really speak to the dad to be and gives him information. I would title it 'You've put the bun in the oven, now what?

I would still included info about how the baby is doing. But instead of using fruit analogies like it would be the size of a grapefruit I would use man talk like sporting equipment, the size of a cricket ball, squash ball, can of beer etc. I would also let men know what is expected of them from getting the nursery reading, to behaving when bub arrives. I might write up a draft in the coming weeks. When my brother publishes one of his books I'll get him to put in the good word to look at mine!!!!

I guess I better pull up stumps!!!

Until then hail to the bun in Annaliese's oven!

No comments:

Post a Comment